Monthly Archives: April 2016

We are family. 

Do you ever stop and think what it would be like for someone to randomly walk in to your life or household? Ever thought of how adoption works? I know I have. 

Although my story goes a slightly different way. 

When I think of it now, I think nothing even close to adoption, however it has its similarities. My Brother’s best friend is Samoan and they have been friends for as long as I can remember. I can tell you now that I don’t know his full story, all I know is that he moved to Australia at a young age and didn’t have a lot. 

My Brother then basically took him under his wing in a way, something I’m extremely proud of him for doing. He moved in with my Brother and I think he would agree was the best thing for him. 

He is now my third Brother. Not my Brother’s friend or a family friend, he’s my Brother and always will be. He spends Christmas with us, comes to family dinners and still shares a very special friendship with my brother. 

When I think about it, I’m in awe of my parents and Brother. My brother helped his best mate through a hard stage of his life and provided for him and my Parents also leant a helping hand, a big hand. 

My life without my third Brother wouldn’t be the same and I’ll be forever grateful for him. 

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My journey through grief

‘You will always be with me’

Losing people you love affects you. It’s buried inside of you and becomes this big, deep hole of ache. It doesn’t magically go away, even when you stop officially mourning.

Anyone with a heart, with a family, has experienced loss. No one escapes unscathed. Every story of separation is different, but I think we all understand that basic, wrenching emotion that comes from saying goodbye, not knowing if we’ll see that person again—or perhaps knowing that we won’t.

 Death. It’s around more than people realise. Because no one wants to talk about it or hear about it. It’s too sad. Too painful. Too hard. The list of reasons is endless.

 A feeling of pleasure or solace can be so hard to find when you are in the depths of your grief. Sometimes it’s the little things that help get you through the day. You may think your comforts sound ridiculous to others, but there is nothing ridiculous about finding one little thing to help you feel good in the midst of pain and sorrow!

If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them.

I still miss those I loved who are no longer with me but I find I am grateful for having loved them. The gratitude has finally conquered the loss.

 Tomorrow marks 6 years since the accident. My goodness do I wish I could go back and change it all but I can’t, so I deal with it daily and take each day as it comes to remember and treasure my girl whom I miss dearly.


I love you Brittany
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Until next time… T xx

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V A L U E S

I’m going to jump straight in to this.

Don’t take this as pointing fingers or thinking I’m trying to tell you the right way of life or how to live, this is simply my thoughts on my past experiences.

I think when you pin point certain things in your life, people often numerise their values in crazy orders. I’m not saying this is wrong, I just want to say that I think it’s an important factor. You don’t have to sit down one day and list each value and what order they come in. But think hard, as to what you want to achieve in life, what values you want have and which paths you want to follow.

I’m going to list a few of my values, in my choice of order and explain my reasoning.

  1. FAMILY
    My most treasured value. The people who I look up to, who are they for me through thick and thin. Honest people who you can confide in, whenever you may need to. Never take your Family for granted, they are best people in your life.
  2. HAPPINESS
    It comes as a broad subject.  I am not saying that you have to live the happiest life every single day. Things happen, your mood changes. All I’m saying is that there is always something to be happy about, even in your darkest days you can find a happy moment.  And in this time, if you can’t find that happiness, seek help to the people around you, let them help you find your piece of happiness, even if it only a small piece or lasts a few hours, let them help you.  Happiness is the best gift you will ever receive.
  3. BALANCE
    Balance in your life is a must.  I won’t go in to detail with this one, as I could go on for paragraphs. But when you find your healthy and happy balance, you will know.  Don’t give up until you find it, it’s worth it.
  4. BEING THE BEST
    Being better than the people around you, not at all. None of that comes close to mattering. But being the best person you can possibly be and being happy with your look, status, personality- that’s a big importance in life. If you can come to terms with the person you are, (which everybody should) you will lead a healthy lifestyle.
  5. POSITIVITY
    One word that you should not forget.  Be positive, always. Negativity gets you nowhere.
  6. THANKFULNESS
    Something that can change a person’s day. Always be thankful, it’s the easiest thing you can do and you never know how it could affect someone. ‘Thanks’ or ‘Thank You’, it’s really not that hard to say. Always be thankful, for your Parents, your siblings, your extended Family, your Partner, your Children, having a roof over your head, for food, a job, for anything.  We don’t stop and think about how lucky we are.  Thank the lady behind the counter for your coffee. So many people are worse off than we are, and sometimes all it takes is a simple ‘Thank you very much’ to put a smile on someone’s face or to simply cheer them up. Thank you goes a long way. And I think it’s a word that needs to be used more often.

This in no means is trying to say your Values should be the same as mine, or that I am in fact right on this topic.  It’s just my way of trying to show people just how lucky and fortunate we are and to never take something for granted.

Always be kind. Always be thankful. Be honest & learn to love.

Until next time.

T; xxx

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