I’m alone, but I don’t need you

When I say alone, I don’t mean it in a way that I am struggling or feel distant. I purely mean that I am single, not dating anyone nor am I interested in a certain someone.

I went through a rough few months, heck you could almost say it was a year where I relied on the catch-ups, text messages and the joy that I got from visiting someone whom I grew quite fond of. It was great for a few months, but then it all just changed. I was the only one making an effort to catch up, obviously feeling down and disappointed when all I used to get in reply was ‘I’m busy that day’ or ‘Don’t really have time at the moment’.

When I look back now, then and there I should have realised it was never going to work. I should have just said my piece and moved on with life but of course, a typical female, I stuck around for far too long. I would message my friends when he did something that annoyed me or didn’t want to catch up (rather than just telling him how I felt). I would message him almost every week for a catch up but more often than not, we wouldn’t do anything – and if we did, it was take out and a movie at home, never anything fun or a “date” as such.

After awhile, I got sick of it as anyone would. I would go a few weeks without speaking to him but then I would catch myself in glimpses of boredom or wanting that afternoon cuddle, and I sent the message and I would go and catch up (on his terms). I did this a few times until I really looked at myself and thought, why? Why put yourself through this, why let him determine when you get to see him and what you do, he only ever wanted to see you when he felt like it.

After too many months, I’m there! I have finally moved on. Why do we all just go with the flow, let people (not just men) treat us in a way we don’t want to be treated nor would we treat anyone else? I learnt so much in this time. Most times than not, we are worthy of so much more than we receive.

You receive the love you think you deserve, so don’t feel cocky or a little bit full of yourself when working out what you want in your relationship. Most of us deserve so much more than we actually think – just remember that! Don’t take as long as I did to work it out either, it’s so simple, we all know the answer deep down, just follow your heart and do what is right for YOU! You will be a better person for it in the long run.

Until next time, keep smiling!
T xo

2 thoughts on “I’m alone, but I don’t need you

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