He saved me.

There comes a stage in your life where no matter how you felt about a person or what you went through, you have to stop and say a simple ‘thank you’.

My ex boyfriend and I broke up over almost three years ago now, it wasn’t one of those awful, nasty breakups but it had its rough edges. He was the best thing to happen to me at that point in my life, he treated me with respect, love and cared for me beyond measure. I think I treated him much the same, he might think different but I would like to hope that at times he thought our relationship was as good as I saw it was.

We were having a few struggles when I encountered the most horrific thing I’ve ever been through (which I’ve written about before). My cousin was suddenly killed in a car accident. At the time I found out, I was at my boyfriend’s house, I couldn’t even really tell you what happened. I remember him just hugging me, and holding me close and trying to help me through my pain…but in my sadness and shock, I just said I had to go and I left for my Brother’s house to be with my Family.

I won’t go into depth with what happened the days, weeks, months that followed but all I can say is that if you go through such a tragic event like I did, you really need to reach out and talk to somebody. I told my Boyfriend I needed a break because I couldn’t deal with what happened, and at the time I thought that was the best thing I could do and the right thing because I didn’t want him having to put up with what state I was in.  I don’t regret making that decision, because I’m a big believer in ‘everything happens for a reason’ but if I could do it over again, I wouldn’t tell him that, in fact I would do the exact opposite to everything I did.

I would stay close, I would talk to him about my feelings and tell him I’m not coping, I’d go around when he wanted me to and I would hold him longer than I ever had. In fact, I’d take back every drink I sipped on that would ‘numb’ the pain for me but then send me spiraling into fits off distress, tears and anger that I could never handle. I would take back every one of those drinks and trade it for a night on the couch with my partner telling him I wasn’t OK and trying to work through what I felt to help better my relationship.

But, I didn’t take that path and I know there is a good reason for that. One day I will work out what that is. And I hope that if or when another tragic event like this happens to me, whoever I may be with, I hope I take the path I should have 3 years ago. We aren’t that close of friends anymore, in fact we barely talk so I have never gotten the chance to thank him and tell him that he quite literally ‘saved me’. I know I said I chose the wrong path, but the persistence of him caring for me, his love and guidance and simple words helped me in ways some people will never quite understand. And for that, I’ll be forever grateful. Hopefully one day I’ll get the chance to tell him that.

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A friend’s love.

There are so many different friendships you obtain as you grow old. Like I’ve always said, some are only a small part of your journey and some hang around for the long haul. Then there’s that rather small few that will just never change.

I met a girl on a Cruise I went on from Sydney for my 18th Birthday, since then we’ve always kept in touch.  She resides in Sydney, myself from Brisbane.  Yeah, there were times where we didn’t speak for weeks or even months, but all it took was one phone call and many minutes of conversation on the phone to pick straight back up where we left off.

That was 5 years ago and I still hold the most precious bond with this woman.

She now has a family, 3 year old boy and a 14 month year old little girl. Watching her over the past few years I have felt so many emotions. I was hopeful at the start when I found out that she was pregnant that she would be a good Mother – not because I didn’t think she would be, but that’s just what I hoped for her. I remember the night she told me when she was first pregnant, I was over the moon and so happy for her.

Now I see her walking around with her two beautiful children and being the best possible Mother whilst still being that ray of sunshine she’s always been. I am so proud of the person she changed to be so that she could provide and look after her Family.  She had a partner, however times have been tough lately and she has walked around from an unhealthy relationship. We caught up just yesterday and she let me know that they had split and she had decided to leave- and that she didn’t want to tell me over just a phone call.  I am so glad I made the drive to Noosa to visit her.

She needed me, and I am SO glad that I could be there. We sat for hours over a 3 course meal and just discussed everything she’d been through and the options she has now that her future is up in the air. It was so nice to know that she could come to when she most needed it and feel safe to talk to me, because I know I would do the exact same thing with her. Friendship is really such a special thing.

I’m not sure where I wanted this post to go but I think there’s a few things that we could all pull from it.

A) Distance doesn’t affect a Friendship when effort is made
B) You are never alone, even if it feels that way
C) Don’t feel like you have to stay if you’re in a unhealthy relationship
D) Family is the most important
E) Talk!  Let it out, as hard as it may be, you need to try.

Until next time… T x

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To the Negative’s

For being such a positive person, it’s usually so easy for me to shut out the negativity that is around these days.  However, there is only so much a human can take. I am the best at always smiling, and even smiling when sometime’s I don’t really want to. I’m always very good at taking the best out of any situation. But lately, I have so much negativity coming my way from people you really just need to grow up and get a life, but it’s hit me. It’s so hard to be extra positive when every one around you is trying to bring you down… I didn’t want to let them win – that is one of my biggest factors, don’t let the mean people win, but sometime’s it just becomes too much.

I’m a coach, a good coach at that. I’ll admit that in the least snobbish way. However, there is so many derogative comments from every one around you that doesn’t Volunteer their time, or appreciate what you do. So, to those people, I right the following letter.  I may never send it, but I had to right it.

“Parents,

Over the last few weeks I’ve heard comments that are being made behind my back. I have heard many things that are being said such as my quality as a coach, my skill level, people full of ‘suggestions’ as to who should be on the court or who is a ‘better’ player or how I lost that day’s game for the kids. I thought I’d write an open letter to all of you parents, even though I might never send it. I’ll start it this way: “I am a volunteer.”

I’m the one who put my hand up to coach the State League team, there’s a big start already, not a lot of people would put their hands up for that position. I understand that you all of you are too busy. I have some news for you, I’m not retired, I hold down a full time job. I’m busy too, trying my very best to teach and improve these children how to play a sport they love. And on top of that full time job that most of us have, I train hard and commit to my State League team and have only my Sunday’s free for my own self. Not only do I not get paid to do this – it costs me money.

I know. I make mistakes. In fact, I’m never going to be close to being perfect. But I treat the kids fairly and with respect; and without me or someone like me, there’d be no team for them to play on. I’m part of this community too and it’s no picnic being out here on this stage like this. It’s a lot easier back there with the other parents where no one is second-guessing you.

After this game is over, I’ll be the last one to leave. I have to pack up all the gear and make sure everyone has had a parent arrive to pick them up. There have been evenings when the Manager and I waited with a player for some time until someone eventually came to get them. Many nights I’m sure you’ve already had dinner and are relaxing on the couch by the time I finally get home and kick off my shoes.

If I sound angry, I’m not. I do this because I love it and I love being around the kids and teaching them this wonderful game. There are plenty of rewards and I remind myself that while you’re out there throwing around derogative and nasty things about my persona or coaching. The positives outweigh the negatives. I just wish sometime those who don’t choose to volunteer their time would leave the coaching to the few of us who do.

Yours sincerely

The Coach”

Has anyone had this happen to them over the years? I’d love to hear your stories, or ways that help you keep a positive mind frame about it all? It doesn’t have to be sport related, this can happen in so many different situations.

So, until next time.. Be Happy, Smile, and please throw around kindness like confetti- negativity is awful, and if you can kick those negative thoughts from your mind, I guarantee you’ll become a better person.

T.. xx

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Meet the Blogger

Good Morning from Australia!

I’ve decided that I’m going to try and do a Questionnaire/Quiz post each month so that hopefully my followers start to get to know me and my lifestyle a little better.

I thought I’d start off with one about me personally, so here I go.

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1. Are you named after anyone? Not that I know, my Mum had a different name picked out but was adamant I was going to be a boy so she didn’t really mind what girls name they had picked out. Dad said he didn’t like the name Mum had chosen so picked ‘Tara’ so Dad won that time round.

2. When was the last time you cried? Last night, Mum and I watched the movie ‘Me before You’…. tear jerker!!!

3. Do you have kids? No, but I look forward to the day I do.

4. If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself? Yeah, I would.

5. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Probably too much, but I would rather be sarcastic than too serious. I just be careful who I use it around

6. Will you ever bungee-jump? I don’t think I could bring my self to do it.

7. What’s your favorite cereal? Coco Pops or Sugar frosties!

8. What’s the first thing you notice about people? Their smile.

9. What is your eye colour? Hazel.

10. Scary movie or happy endings? Definitely happy endings.

11. Favorite smells? Woodwick candles.

12. Summer or winter? I’m a Summer girl, I love to rug up and the Winter food but nothing beats sunshine on the beach!

13. Computer or television? TV.

14. What’s the furthest you’ve ever been from home? Europe.

15. Do you have any special talents? Not exactly… it’s not a talent but a lot of people don’t know that I can play the Clarinet quite well..

16. Where were you born? In QLD, Australia.

17. What are your hobbies? Netball, picnics in the park, spending time with my family, running and plenty more.

18. Do you have any pets? I used to have a dog, but haven’t had any pets for years.

19. Favorite movie? The list could go on forever, but I’ll name a few- Jumper, Fast and Furious sequels, Suddenly 30, Taken.

20. Do you have any siblings? Yes…2 older Brothers, they are seriously the best!

21. What do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be happy, always.

Until next time, T xx

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My favourite destination

There’s just something about the way you feel when you decide to travel.

The weeks or months leading up to it give you so many mixed emotions. The sense of being disorganised or not well prepared but then the absolute excitement that you’re about to head away on a holiday. Whether it be just to Sydney, a little further to New Zealand or 20 something hours away, I always get that buzz. Travelling completely changes me, not to say it changes every one, but me, definitely.

I am always a energetic and happy person, but when it comes time to travel, I don’t know how but I become even happier, a smile as wide as my cheeks. Even when I go for a week, it feels like 2, a month feels like 6…and that’s the thing I love about holidaying.

I’ve been lucky enough to see a fair few places, all which have been so surreal and spectacular… I always thought that you could never have a favourite overseas travel destination because every place offers different things and are so unique in their own ways but I was wrong – I went somewhere (twice) and both times I left a part of me there.

New York City.

You hear the term ‘the city that never sleeps’ and kind of just think, ‘yeah, ok’ but until you see and experience it, that term is bang on. I find New York absolutely admirable. The sky, to the fresh air, high rises, rooftop bars, Central Park, literally everything in New York makes me ridiculously happy. To be honest, I can’t even explain why I love it so much, I just know that this one city, makes me feel so alive. More than I do any where else, even my own home town.

I have been twice now, I got to experience it with my parents which was amazing and the perfect people to spend my first time in New York with, it was very special. The second was for my 21st birthday, with my best friend at the time. We had a blast! Bike rides through Central Park, cocktails on rooftops, ice skating at the Rockefeller Centre and so much more. But the one moment that just stopped me in my tracks and made me feel like I had no care in the world was when we visited 230 Fifth. High above the city of New York was the most unbelievable bar, the staff were delightful, the drinks were spot on, my company was brilliant.  Put those few things together and you basically have the perfect night, the one thing that topped it off was it overlooked the Empire State Building.

I got the shivers at how perfect I felt in this moment and in fact, thinking about it still gives me that same feeling.  I hope I get to experience it again one day, in the exact same spot because in that moment, I felt complete. Whole.

I’ll post a photo below – check out the view. And please, if you are heading to New York, you HAVE to visit this marvelous bar. It’s impressively mind blowing to say the least.

Until next time, T xx

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A bunch of Q&A’s

1) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4. Type the sentence down below

Eyes up, footwork, passes (it’s a netball book)

2) Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, What can you touch?
My work phone and notepad

3) Before you started this survey, what were you doing?
Working and drinking my Latte

4) What is the last thing you watched on TV?
NCIS

5) What are on the walls of the room you are in?
Photos of family and friends, whiteboard and a NRL Season Fixture calendar

6) Tell me something about you that most people don’t know.
I love to relax and debrief to myself – I am such an energetic person and happy 99% of the time. I love being that way, but sometimes that makes people think that you’re always OK.  I love nothing better than sitting back with a cup of tea and reflecting on things and having a sad moment if I need one.

7) Who made the last incoming call on your phone?
A Face time call from my Dad from London- can’t wait for them to come home.

8) What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
A few pictures from my phone.

9) Last time you swam in a pool?
A few weeks ago when I had a weekend away in Maroochydore.

10) Choice of clothes, branded or local?
Definitely local.  I see no point in paying ridiculous amounts of money for clothing that you can get sick of so easily and also the fact that for what some people pay for one item of clothing, I can almost get a whole outfit!

11) Your last massage? What type?
I used to go so frequently, but I haven’t been in so long.  It would have been a full body massage though.  I always contemplate what to get, but in the end I always go with the full body.  Once someone massages my shoulders or just my legs it leaves me wanting more.  Can’t go wrong with a full body.

12) What was the last thing you bought?
A TDE Clutch for my Mum for Mother’s Day

13) What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
‘I wonder what today will bring?’

14) If you were to spend a day with a famous person, who would it be?
Sophia Bush.

15) Who sent the last text message you received?
Tahlia- one of my best friends.

16) Is the glass half empty or half full?

People say I’m a glass half full so I’ll go with that.

17) Would you go all out with PDA’s? (Public Display’s of Affection)

Only what I’m comfortable with.

18) How are you feeling right now?
Happy & grateful.

19) Would you consider going further on your first date, if everything goes well?
First date is getting to know each other, nothing else. If everything goes well from there, then I’d just have to look at planning more dates.

20) What is the last movie that you saw at the cinema?
I can’t even remember it was that long ago.  I’m not a cinema girl.

21) Do you sing in the shower?
Who doesn’t?  I don’t think I’ve ever gotten in and not sung.

22) Which came first the chicken or the egg?
The chicken…. Is this a trick question?

23) How many keys on your key ring?

WAY too many. It’s ridiculous!

24) What are your best physical features?
I like my eyes! But I am happy with what I’ve got, I’m far, far from perfect but there is no point in wishing you were something or someone else.  Be happy with what you were given and embrace it. No one is perfect.

25) What are your best characteristics?
I am easy going.  I am thoughtful and caring towards people and I love to have a laugh.  I like to think that I am happy majority of the time which I think more people need to do.

26) What is your favorite time of the day?

Sunrise or sunset…those parts of the day are just magical.

27) What would you say is your ‘dress’ code right now? Formal, casual, comfortable, minimal?

Casual and comfortable.

28) How many rings before you answer the phone?
Usually one or two at work, I don’t want to keep people waiting.

29) What is most important in life?
Family and being happy.

30) What are the places people are least likely to find you?
A Library, or a dentist- yuck.

31) An unforgettable moment(s)
Travelling with my Parents.  New York with one of my best friends.  Simple sunrise moments to appreciate life. Winning Grand Finals for netball with some of my best friends.

32) If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
For every one to lead a healthy lifestyle.

33) Do you like to dance?
After a few sneaky beverage, sure.

34) Would you ever consider living abroad?
I did think about it, but I have travelled a far bit and I just love coming home to Australia.  Don’t get me wrong, the world is just magnificent but nothing beats home.

Jump on board and answer the above questions- it really makes you think hard and be honest with yourself.  Let me know if you post the answers, I would love to have a read and learn new facts about people worldwide.

Thanks to ‘Inspirational Gem’ for posting her Answers for us to read and inspiring me to do the same.  Check out her page if you get a chance, worth the read: https://inspirationalgem.wordpress.com/

Sending happiness and love your way…
Until next time,  T  x

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Friendship

Friends are going to leave you with so many emotions. Raw, cherished, sad, happy moments. The list goes on. 

Some friends will bring out the best of you and continue to do that, some might only bring it out of you for a few years. Some friends are simply a chapter in the book, with the page turning over time. 

I’ve had a lot of friends who are now past chapters. I will always be grateful for them however they aren’t a big part of my life anymore. They aren’t a constant. 

I am lucky to have a few close friends who are writing out the whole book with me though. Ones who have been for there through thick and thin, who’ve hung around when times have gotten tough, who’ve simply had my back since our first day of friendship. 

I will always be thankful, and I will continue to personally thank them for that. I think that is a big part of a lasting friendship- to simply cherish someone, and really mean it. So many people take friends for granted when it’s actually so much more. 

The fact someone helps you grow, tells you wrong verse right, picks you up when you are falling, makes you laugh and puts in the effort is priceless. 

Thank your friends, as much as possible. They are the ones helping you through this journey called ‘life’. 

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