Tag Archives: love

Love yourself.

There are so many of us that just don’t want to be alone, that are always wanting someone by their side or desperately searching. You aren’t alone. Just because you don’t have a special someone in your life, doesn’t mean that you are not loved. Your Family, friends, colleagues, heck even strangers- they spread just as much love and light as a partner could.

I hate seeing people jump from one relationship to another so quickly. I think sometimes the fact of not having someone there scares people, but it shouldn’t. If anything, it should help you grow.

Not being in a relationship, I think is healthy for you. You learn to love yourself and take care of yourself without relying on someone to do it for you or to keep you grounded. This is only the way I look at, a lot of people would completely disagree. I just think that if you can learn to enjoy life and be full of happiness by yourself, you don’t have to rely on someone to do that for you and that’s the best way to be.

I have never been happier and I haven’t dated for a few years now. But in that time frame of not dating, I have truly found myself. I have found new passions that I never knew I loved, I made new friends and re-connected with some old ones. I realised how simple things in life can be the best. Things like going to the markets every Saturday, reading a book with a cup of tea on my back patio or buying myself fresh flowers each week. Things that everyone want other people to do for or with them, but are just as rewarding on your own. Cherish the small things, make them count. That’s what will make you happy.

I grew as a person, and I did it alone. You can too. Don’t be in a toxic relationship or situation and be unhappy, get out, have the time of your life and rediscover yourself – it will be one of the best things you do for yourself! I am not at all saying relationships are bad, they’re great. But if you are unhappy in yours, do the small things I’ve just written above and then you will know exactly when you’re ready for love again.

Life is one big adventure. Enjoy it. Always.

Until next time, T xo
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I’m alone, but I don’t need you

When I say alone, I don’t mean it in a way that I am struggling or feel distant. I purely mean that I am single, not dating anyone nor am I interested in a certain someone.

I went through a rough few months, heck you could almost say it was a year where I relied on the catch-ups, text messages and the joy that I got from visiting someone whom I grew quite fond of. It was great for a few months, but then it all just changed. I was the only one making an effort to catch up, obviously feeling down and disappointed when all I used to get in reply was ‘I’m busy that day’ or ‘Don’t really have time at the moment’.

When I look back now, then and there I should have realised it was never going to work. I should have just said my piece and moved on with life but of course, a typical female, I stuck around for far too long. I would message my friends when he did something that annoyed me or didn’t want to catch up (rather than just telling him how I felt). I would message him almost every week for a catch up but more often than not, we wouldn’t do anything – and if we did, it was take out and a movie at home, never anything fun or a “date” as such.

After awhile, I got sick of it as anyone would. I would go a few weeks without speaking to him but then I would catch myself in glimpses of boredom or wanting that afternoon cuddle, and I sent the message and I would go and catch up (on his terms). I did this a few times until I really looked at myself and thought, why? Why put yourself through this, why let him determine when you get to see him and what you do, he only ever wanted to see you when he felt like it.

After too many months, I’m there! I have finally moved on. Why do we all just go with the flow, let people (not just men) treat us in a way we don’t want to be treated nor would we treat anyone else? I learnt so much in this time. Most times than not, we are worthy of so much more than we receive.

You receive the love you think you deserve, so don’t feel cocky or a little bit full of yourself when working out what you want in your relationship. Most of us deserve so much more than we actually think – just remember that! Don’t take as long as I did to work it out either, it’s so simple, we all know the answer deep down, just follow your heart and do what is right for YOU! You will be a better person for it in the long run.

Until next time, keep smiling!
T xo

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Friendship

Friends are going to leave you with so many emotions. Raw, cherished, sad, happy moments. The list goes on. 

Some friends will bring out the best of you and continue to do that, some might only bring it out of you for a few years. Some friends are simply a chapter in the book, with the page turning over time. 

I’ve had a lot of friends who are now past chapters. I will always be grateful for them however they aren’t a big part of my life anymore. They aren’t a constant. 

I am lucky to have a few close friends who are writing out the whole book with me though. Ones who have been for there through thick and thin, who’ve hung around when times have gotten tough, who’ve simply had my back since our first day of friendship. 

I will always be thankful, and I will continue to personally thank them for that. I think that is a big part of a lasting friendship- to simply cherish someone, and really mean it. So many people take friends for granted when it’s actually so much more. 

The fact someone helps you grow, tells you wrong verse right, picks you up when you are falling, makes you laugh and puts in the effort is priceless. 

Thank your friends, as much as possible. They are the ones helping you through this journey called ‘life’. 

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We are family. 

Do you ever stop and think what it would be like for someone to randomly walk in to your life or household? Ever thought of how adoption works? I know I have. 

Although my story goes a slightly different way. 

When I think of it now, I think nothing even close to adoption, however it has its similarities. My Brother’s best friend is Samoan and they have been friends for as long as I can remember. I can tell you now that I don’t know his full story, all I know is that he moved to Australia at a young age and didn’t have a lot. 

My Brother then basically took him under his wing in a way, something I’m extremely proud of him for doing. He moved in with my Brother and I think he would agree was the best thing for him. 

He is now my third Brother. Not my Brother’s friend or a family friend, he’s my Brother and always will be. He spends Christmas with us, comes to family dinners and still shares a very special friendship with my brother. 

When I think about it, I’m in awe of my parents and Brother. My brother helped his best mate through a hard stage of his life and provided for him and my Parents also leant a helping hand, a big hand. 

My life without my third Brother wouldn’t be the same and I’ll be forever grateful for him. 

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My journey through grief

‘You will always be with me’

Losing people you love affects you. It’s buried inside of you and becomes this big, deep hole of ache. It doesn’t magically go away, even when you stop officially mourning.

Anyone with a heart, with a family, has experienced loss. No one escapes unscathed. Every story of separation is different, but I think we all understand that basic, wrenching emotion that comes from saying goodbye, not knowing if we’ll see that person again—or perhaps knowing that we won’t.

 Death. It’s around more than people realise. Because no one wants to talk about it or hear about it. It’s too sad. Too painful. Too hard. The list of reasons is endless.

 A feeling of pleasure or solace can be so hard to find when you are in the depths of your grief. Sometimes it’s the little things that help get you through the day. You may think your comforts sound ridiculous to others, but there is nothing ridiculous about finding one little thing to help you feel good in the midst of pain and sorrow!

If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them.

I still miss those I loved who are no longer with me but I find I am grateful for having loved them. The gratitude has finally conquered the loss.

 Tomorrow marks 6 years since the accident. My goodness do I wish I could go back and change it all but I can’t, so I deal with it daily and take each day as it comes to remember and treasure my girl whom I miss dearly.


I love you Brittany
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Until next time… T xx

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V A L U E S

I’m going to jump straight in to this.

Don’t take this as pointing fingers or thinking I’m trying to tell you the right way of life or how to live, this is simply my thoughts on my past experiences.

I think when you pin point certain things in your life, people often numerise their values in crazy orders. I’m not saying this is wrong, I just want to say that I think it’s an important factor. You don’t have to sit down one day and list each value and what order they come in. But think hard, as to what you want to achieve in life, what values you want have and which paths you want to follow.

I’m going to list a few of my values, in my choice of order and explain my reasoning.

  1. FAMILY
    My most treasured value. The people who I look up to, who are they for me through thick and thin. Honest people who you can confide in, whenever you may need to. Never take your Family for granted, they are best people in your life.
  2. HAPPINESS
    It comes as a broad subject.  I am not saying that you have to live the happiest life every single day. Things happen, your mood changes. All I’m saying is that there is always something to be happy about, even in your darkest days you can find a happy moment.  And in this time, if you can’t find that happiness, seek help to the people around you, let them help you find your piece of happiness, even if it only a small piece or lasts a few hours, let them help you.  Happiness is the best gift you will ever receive.
  3. BALANCE
    Balance in your life is a must.  I won’t go in to detail with this one, as I could go on for paragraphs. But when you find your healthy and happy balance, you will know.  Don’t give up until you find it, it’s worth it.
  4. BEING THE BEST
    Being better than the people around you, not at all. None of that comes close to mattering. But being the best person you can possibly be and being happy with your look, status, personality- that’s a big importance in life. If you can come to terms with the person you are, (which everybody should) you will lead a healthy lifestyle.
  5. POSITIVITY
    One word that you should not forget.  Be positive, always. Negativity gets you nowhere.
  6. THANKFULNESS
    Something that can change a person’s day. Always be thankful, it’s the easiest thing you can do and you never know how it could affect someone. ‘Thanks’ or ‘Thank You’, it’s really not that hard to say. Always be thankful, for your Parents, your siblings, your extended Family, your Partner, your Children, having a roof over your head, for food, a job, for anything.  We don’t stop and think about how lucky we are.  Thank the lady behind the counter for your coffee. So many people are worse off than we are, and sometimes all it takes is a simple ‘Thank you very much’ to put a smile on someone’s face or to simply cheer them up. Thank you goes a long way. And I think it’s a word that needs to be used more often.

This in no means is trying to say your Values should be the same as mine, or that I am in fact right on this topic.  It’s just my way of trying to show people just how lucky and fortunate we are and to never take something for granted.

Always be kind. Always be thankful. Be honest & learn to love.

Until next time.

T; xxx

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Two of the best. 

A Mother and Father are the two that brought you in to this world. They gave you life, cared for you, watched you grow and helped you. 

As years pass, the bond between children and their parents can go in so many different directions. Fortunately, my direction was the best possible way. 

I hold my Mother and Father in the highest regard. They are the two most generous, kind hearted, loving, giving, passionate people. They have given me everything and so much more. 

I find it so sad that some children and Parental bonds don’t take the direction I’ve had. 

The one thing I hope for when I think of having a family; is that I’m half the person my parents are today. 

I can’t express in words the love I have for them, but I do know it shows no boundaries. 

Your Parents are the people that no matter what happens, they will be there. Whether your parents have split, you’re angry at them or going through a difficult situation.. Please take the advice of ‘forgiveness’. 

Because right when you really need someone, a Mother and Father are the best support. 

  My two rocks 

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